What clients experience when having therapy

You may question why people go to therapy? What is different about talking to a counsellor than talking to your friends and family?

Quite often our loved ones are great to talk too but they may find it difficult to sit with you when you are emotional. They may want to ‘fix’ you and make you feel better or get defence and not hear you properly.

A couple of examples of that are to do with two different emotions that clients may be feeling.

If someone you care about is upset and crying, what do you do? Offer comfort, hug them, pat their hand or arm, tell them it will be ok? These are all normal responses – but they won’t really happen in therapy. We let the client carry on crying and work through it. It may seem harsh, but it’s about giving the upset space. Otherwise we can end up suppressing it to make other people feel better.

One of my clients feedback years ago taught me how powerful this was “you let me cry, you didn’t try to stop me”.